How do you measure a year? Measure in love.

This time last year, I began a wonderful journey with some incredibly talented people. A journey filled with surprises, solid friendships,love,tears, learning experiences and award winning moments.I had the honor of sharing the stage with DC's finest talent. I was one lucky gal.
RENT marks a part of my life that I will never forget.
A year ago today we began rehearsals for RENT. A show I had always dreamed of being in. A soundtrack I sang to over and over again, countless times.
I remember walking into our first rehearsal sooo nervous and a little intimidated.
This was my first experience with a top notch, highly acclaimed theater company.
The moment I heard everyone sing, I thought to myself, "what the heck am I doing here? Am I really doing this show? How did I make it?" I mean, After the auditions,all the callbacks and hearing some people sing, I was certain I didn't have a chance.
These people were UNBELIEVABLE. The harmonies were on point and the voices so strong.
I left every rehearsal in awe. I could not believe I was a part of this.

A year later, I can look back and say that this experience was the best experience of my life. A dream come true.
The friendships that we all developed with one another, the connection we had was just priceless.
During the run I found out that my mothers cancer came back for the 3rd time.
I can't even begin to tell you how perfect the timing was for that news. I was surrounded by my cast with unbelievable support, only to find out that majority of my cast mates had experienced the same with their parents. A lot of them even lost their parents to cancer. This broke my heart. All I could think of was, "Wow, these are some strong people."
The night we all opened up about that topic- the connection and the bond became even tighter.
To this day, I'm so thankful that God surrounded me with such a huge support group, a group who finally knew what I was feeling and talking about. A group that I've needed this whole time. Perfect timing. Thanks, God.
This cast was a cast filled with nothing but love. Everyone who saw the show made comments like, "You can tell that you guys really love each another."
It was so evident.

So many hilarious moments and months I spent with this crew and I wouldn never change it for the world.

So, here's to one amazing year with my Kitties. Thank you for being a huge part of my life. Thank you to Mark, Susan and Kurt for giving me such an amazing opportunity.
Without all of you, I would never be the "Blanket" that I am today. HA! ohboy.

I wish I could see all of you in your current successes and share the stage with you once more...a stage in...Ireland *wink*

Let's recap with some photo's, shall we?

In the VERY Beginning: Promotion Shots:


Almost the middle: Seasons of Love:


The Middle:New Years 2010:


Almost the End: Winning at The Helen Hayes Awards:


The End: My Goodbye Party:

Update on Mom:Volume 2

Well, we've had a couple of scary days these past few months. But, to catch you up to this day- She's the best I've seen her (since i've been here)
A couple of weeks ago she spent a week in the hospital. She had a moment of short term memory loss,weakness and couldn't walk or stay up straight.
The EMS had to take her to the ER and from there she was admitted. Her blood levels had dropped the lowest they'd ever been. So, that just threw everything out of wack.
A day after, the Doctor pulled me aside and asked me if My mom had a living will. He said to get that ready right away, because he felt that we may be towards the end.
As he was telling me this, it wasn't really phasing me at all. Ya know, usually when people are told something like this, They instantly start crying...Well, at least in the movies they do. But, I didn't feel it. I didn't feel that we were coming to an end at all.
I mean, Yeah it was a little scary to see my mom being taken away in an ambulance,to see her so weak and suffer from memory loss to where she couldn't even remember that she had cancer. But at that time, I didn't feel like we were going to lose her.
After the Doctor shared his thoughts, I struggled with whether or not to tell mom what he said. I mean, I planned on telling her, but not right then.
I waited to tell her when my brother was around, so that way we could talk about it and encourage her together.
Well, it didn't work. She was so fixated on the words "Near the end", it was so hard to convince her otherwise.
During this time, we had some special visitors. Mr & Mrs. Keipi, Some close friends of mine from Virginia, who also became friends with my mom.
The timing couldn't have been more perfect. Not only for my mom, but for me as well. It was so nice to have familiar faces and encouragement.
Their presence brought so much. Their love for God and for others just filled and lifted everyone's spirits within mom's little hospital room.
Even the Nurses were asking about them after they left :)
They prayed over mom, listened to mom and her stories (that's huge, because she's very long winded and she repeated herself so much that week)
Like I said, their visit was perfect. It lifted my mom's spirits and she was so encouraged. After they left, she didn't really talk about being "near the end" as much as she did before. Thank goodness.
Meanwhile, the doctor decided to take her off of chemo. Chemo wasn't really helping the situation, as far as keeping her platelets high and avoiding blood transfusions every week. So he decided to try something else while she was in the hospital.
Everyday He flushed out her system of old plasma and blood and Gave her new of both. This was also to test for TTP which is and can be a fatal blood disease. The new plasa was also in hopes of raising her platelet count.
Well, by the end of the week, her count was a bit higher, but not where they wanted it. It also turns out that she didn't have TTP like the doctor had suspected. Praise God.
Since that didn't really work like he had hoped, the Doctor then decided to put her on another medication that would substitute for her chemo- The Fulvestrant injection. This medication deals with more of the hormonal factor of the cancer.
Again, with new medication, we always need to be aware of the side effects.
By this time (a week later,oct7) she was finally able to go home. Within that day, we really didn't see any side effects.
It wasn't until that night and a few days after that we witnessed some bizarre behavior. My mom wasn't herself at all. It was so strange. She was acting so strange.
Ok, so fast forward to Tuesday, October 19th.
That morning, my uncle took her to her appointment with Doctor Helmer. Everything was fine up until she arrived home...
I was woken up to, "Christina, get outside! it's your mother, the ambulance is on the way!"
I quickly got up and ran outside to see what was going on. My heart was pounding.
Again, I saw something so disturbing. Since then it's been hard to get that vision out of my head.
I saw my mother on her back, in the car. Her eyes were opened so wide, bug eyed and not blinking. She was biting her tongue and looking around like she wanted to say something, but couldn't.
Now, the last time I saw something like this was a few years ago when I witnessed my grandfather moments before he passed and took his last breath.
It was a horrible sight and I started to cry. I was scared. I thought this was it.
At that moment, the paramedics came out of nowhere and grabbed my mom's limp body out of the car. They moved so quickly and took charge.
I immediately got it together and started praying. As I was praying, I got this overwhelming feeling that everything was going to be alright and not to worry.
Soon after, one of the paramedics came over to me and told me that her sugar count was VERY low and she could have gone into a diabetic coma. BUT they caught it in time and gave her some sugar. He said that she was looking better and talking.
Even though they were getting things under control, they were still admitting her into the hospital.
Ok, let's fast forward again to today-
She's home from the hospital and she actually looks better, she's walking a bit better and she's speaking a lot better than she was. She's more herself now- You know how I know? Because she was ready to argue with me about anything and everything. Heh. Oooooh mom. Some things never change...

Well, My Dear family and friends, I have brought you up to speed.
Again, thank you all for your continued prayers and kind words.

As of now, she's doing well and we're going to continue to pray for days like today (minus the argumentative side,heh)

LOVE YOU ALL <3.

Now then, this wouldn't be a proper blog without the famous "CHEERS & JEERS"
Here we go...

CHEERS: Since being unemployed,I have a lot of time on my hands. I'm able to get everything done in a day. That's unusual for me.
JEERS: I'M GOING CRAZY WITHOUT A JOB! AAAAAAAAAAAAH!
*side note* Please pray that I find a job. Specifically within the school district.Thank you.

CHEERS: Quality time with my mom.
JEERS: It has somehow slipped her mind that i'm no longer a child. Therefore she speaks to me like a child.
CONTINUED CHEERS: It's fun to say "Excuse me?" right after she tries to tell me what and how to do something :)

CHEERS: New friends/Meeting new people
JEERS: They are all my mother's nurses at the hospital...

CHEERS: My mom looking out for me and really would like to see me date and or married.
JEERS: Introducing me to random guys as her single daughter, right after finding out that they're Christian AND single. Did I mention I'M RIGHT THERE WHEN SHE DOES THIS?!?! killmenow.

CHEERS: Since being in texas, People no longer mistake me for being Asian (not that it's a bad thing)
JEERS: Since being in texas, I'm like everyone else in Austin..MEXICAN and I don't even know how to be. For shame.

CHEERS: I have INCREDIBLE friends who have been keeping in touch, calling me,writing me, and constantly sending me encouraging messages.
JEERS: I miss them all terribly <3.

Update on Mom

Sorry for the delay, but it's been a rough few days. Thank you all SO MUCH for the prayers and uplifting messages. You have no idea how much it means.Truly.

So, let me fill you in and catch you up...
Monday: Mom in a lot of pain, visited with Dr.Helmer-Found out her platelet count was severely low and was told she cannot continue with treatments (chemo) until she and the platelet count became stronger. Without treatments, she was told that she had 6 months to a year. With still trying to figure things out-Dr.Helmer wanted a bone scan done and then come back for the results on Thursday. Doc gave her something amazing (a patch) to take care of the pain.

The past few nights I kept thinking about what the doctor said and how she could not continue treatment until she got stronger. This worried me. Treatments are what have been keeping her alive, as far as medicine goes.
Here's the thing...
Mom has been weak for some time now and not getting any stronger. Not only are her platelets low, but she's also anemic. She has to have blood transfusions a few times a month.
With both of these things, it's like they're fighting one another.
Producing and also destroying- Therefore, no chance of getting stronger, which would lead to no more treatments.
This conclusion was all I could think about last night. I could hardly wait to hear what the Doctor figured out and what the (bone) scan results would show.

So, Thursday was when we received the toughest news yet...
The bone scan showed evidence of the progression of the disease & bones.
Not only has it grown, but it has also gone into the bone marrow.
With this news, Mom asked, "I'm not getting any better, am I?" Doctor Helmer then replied with, "No, but then again, you haven't been on regular treatments either."

This was exactly what I feared. Without her regular treatments, she wasn't going to get better. What next? Where do we go from here?

Well, The Doctor explained the issue of her platelet counts and it allowing her to continue treatments.

First he said, with the way things are progressing now and with the cancer now in her bone marrow- Without treatment, we are now looking at 3-6 months.

My heart sunk as I looked at my mothers face when the doctor said that. Tears began to fill me eyes, my throat tightened. I quickly swallowed back those tears, straightened my spine and remembered that if there were any moment that I needed to be strong, now was the time. I couldn't keep my eyes off of her as the doctor kept talking.
Doctor Helmer then began to talk about other options. Well, the only other option (right now) is to put her back on Chemo.
With that, there are risks due to her platelets being low. These risks involve minor to major bleeding and could even cause a stroke.

At this point, we're forced to do something to get this under control.

"We're going to take the bull by the horns," Dr.Helmer said.
"Damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead and let's see if we can turn this off and add some time"

With all of this said, Mom and the doctor are choosing to go with chemo. Even with the risks involved.
The doctor said that if this didn't work, then we will try something else.

Man, I've never seen my mother so down. The ride home was completely silent. I didn't know what to say...
When we arrived home, mom went straight to her room and shut the door.
I opened the door, in hopes I could comfort her, but then she asked me to leave. She needed some time. Fair enough.
I went to my room and began to pray and seek scripture. I prayed for the right words to say. For strength- Not only for now, but for the next few months. I prayed for peace and for mom not to give up now.

Today we begin chemo. The doctor said that the side effects (if any were to show) would happen 3-5 days after chemo.
Let's pray that there are zero side affects and that her body takes to the chemo. What an amazing miracle that would be, eh?

Friends/Family, please continue to pray with me. Let's be the prayer warriors that we're called to be.

I don't know what else to do but pray.


Philippians 4:6-7

<3.

"She knows how to make an Entrance!"

"She knows how to make an Entrance!" Says my Uncle Nick.

As some of you may know, I've been having some stomach issues for quite some time now. It wasn't until recently that the pain became insanely worse.
I haven't been able to eat much and when I would eat- it would hurt during or after.

Well, I arrived in Austin, Thursday afternoon in horrible pain.
At first I thought it was just stress, anxiety or home sickness.
As the days went on, the pain was getting out of hand.
It wasn't until today that I gave into my mothers worries and made a trip to the ER.

3 hours later, lab work that showed my liver enzymes were elevated, 1 ultrasound and itchy iv later, Turns out I have Gallstones. Goodbye Gallbladder!

"We're going to need you to stay for a few days and have that Gallbladder removed"

Say whaaaaa? Really? I just got here and already off to a great start!
"Welcome Home, Christina!"

"She really knows how to make an entrance!" Says my uncle.

So, I'm here in my hospital room, in my gorgeous hospital gown and eating jello. I hate jello.

Surgery will happen Monday afternoon and I'll be in the hospital until Tuesday.

Craaaaaaaazy, huh?!?

Well, I'm thankful that I finally know what the issue is and that I'm here with family.

Now that i'm away and I'm sure I will have lots to share- I'll be sure to post often during my Texas Journey.

I love you all soooo much and miss you more than you'll ever know.

Now then. This post wouldn't be complete without CHEERS & JEERS!!

CHEERS: Made it to Texas safe and sound.
JEERS: Cried when I found out I was 2 miles away from the Texas state line.

CHEERS: No one mistakes me for being Asian in TX!!
JEERS: Everyone knows i'm mexican and I've already been asked "Do you speak english?" by some white folks. *ULTIMATE PUNCH TO THE FACE!* idiots.

CHEERS: My mom is awesome at scaring people away
JEERS: She's yelling at the creepy mexican men who stare like it's their job.
"Qué estás mirando?" Yell's the 5 ft, tiny, bald woman. (I love her)

CHEERS: Went to church this morning. It was awesome to hear my brother and sister in law sing.
JEERS: Though the people were nice. I didn't so much dig the church. It made me miss FCC, Pastor Rod and the tight knit, crazy talented musician circle we have. Yeah. I cried (i've got to stop doing that)

Goodbye summer...

Man, I really stink at blogging these days.

I've had so much to say, but so little time to jot.
If anything, the least I could do is supply my usual Cheers & Jeers.
I'll get right on that...

Well, the summer is wrapping up, and not a whole lot went down. Let me just say that this has been a very dull summer.
Dull in the sense that the people who are usually involved in my summers were not around this year, Everyone that's still around Nova- Worked their summer away and The Lazy Susan Dinner Theatre owned me for the majority of my break.

Since this summer is on the bottom of my list. Let me recap summers past and share a few of my favorite Summer time moments...

Let's begin:

Back on blogging track.

It's been FOREVER since my last post.
Forgive me for neglecting my highway of information and happenings in my life.
There is SO much to review.
It's funny, I just went back and read my old blogs... Wow.
SO much has changed. So many different emotions and feelings about everything I ever wrote about.
Crazy how much can change in 10 months, eh?
I won't get into everything in detail, but the least I can do is share the clif notes of the latest 10 months...

Let it begin:
Stepped down from my position with Relevant.
Confessing my love, finally after 5 years.
Health problems.
Crazy doctors leading me to think I had ovarian cancer or if it wasn't that, it was PCOD, which would lead me to difficulties with having babies.
Come to find out it wasn't either of those.
Turns out to be a double uterus. Uncommon,I know. Look it up.
Being extremely hurt by people I trusted.
Putting a lot of trust into the wrong people.
Drama in room 600.
Dreading my job and co-workers.
Loving and becoming deeply attached to my students.
Hired to be in my first professional production.
Pursuing My passion for missions.
Feeling like i'm Slowly losing my best friends to distance.
Renewing friendships.
Disappointments.
Special moments with the ones I love.
Gaining 30 pounds since living in W'burg.
confusion.
Learning what God had to show me and why I was called to W'burg.
Falling out of love.
Saying good bye.
Learning how to love me.
Slowing down.
Controlled.
Growing.
Embracing change and adjustments one more time :)
Talking religion to curious folks who usually want nothing of it.
Moving back to Nova.

There's more, but my list was beginning to sound a bit emo.
If you're interested, pick a topic and I'll write you personally with detail.

All in all, I'm with a thankful heart and Glad to know that God has been with me every step of the way.

Here's to an ending of another chapter.

Let the series continue...

C.S. Lewis Song

If I find in myself desires nothing in this world can satisfy,
I can only conclude that I was not made for here
If the flesh that I fight is at best only light and momentary,
then of course I'll feel nude when to where I'm destined I'm compared

Speak to me in the light of the dawn
Mercy comes with the morning
I will sigh and with all creation groan
As I wait for hope to come for me
Am I lost or just less found?
On the straight or on the roundabout of the wrong way?
is this a soul that stirs in me,
is it breaking free, wanting to come alive?
'Cos my comfort would prefer for me to be numb
And avoid the impending birth of who I was born to become

For we, we are not long here
Our time is but a breath, so we better breathe it
And I, I was made to live,
I was made to love, I was made to know you
Hope is coming for me,Hope is coming for me

Speak to me in the light of the dawn
Mercy comes with the morning
I will sigh and with all creation groan
As I wait for hope to come for me